Baby #2 - A 20 Week Bumpdate.

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This has been, simultaneously, the fastest and slowest pregnancy ever. The first trimester dragged on for an eternity and I thought there would be no end in sight with all the nausea, exhaustion and headaches. But oh my goodness, the second trimester is flying by - the only reason I'm able to remember where I'm at in this pregnancy is because the belly of mine is growing like mad. I am definitely bigger this time around than I was with Everett - sometimes I give myself grace like, "hey, it's a second baby, these things happen!", and then sometimes I'm legitimately worried that I'm growing a 19-lb. human inside of me. I've already grown quite a bit since these family photos were taken a few weeks back by the wonderful Rachel Koontz.

I thought it was high time to resume the bumpdates that I had going the last time I was pregnant. Because its fun. And actually, I have been referring back to those bumpdates lately, trying to remember what I felt like back then. So it's helpful, at least to me!

How Far Along: 20 weeks - 5 months!

Gender: Unknown, but only for 1 more day!

Name: haa yeah right. Ideas please??

Sleeping? Yes! Thankfully. Although I'm beginning to think I need the body pillow I used the last time I was pregnant...

Eating: Fruit! And big breakfasts! My appetite has picked up significantly in the past few weeks, and I am hungry around the clock. Though by dinnertime I couldn't care less about eating. So my day starts out really hearty and healthy and kind of peters out... I wish I wanted to eat more vegetables, they are still grossing me out. Stevie's been force-feeding me asparagus and tomatoes. Yuck.

Emotional Check: I feel like my normal self - none of the mood swings I was experiencing during my first pregnancy! I used to cry all the time, but this pregnancy hasn't been anything like that. In fact, I am just feeling really energetic and alive these days. I'm trying to take advantage of this second tri burst of energy before it leaves me in the third tri. Meaning I've got like 6 half-finished house projects going on right now :)

Movement: Yes! I started feeling the baby move around 17 weeks, which was really reassuring and special. Feeling the baby move is always a turning point for me; beginning to feel connected to this alive little person inside. It's pretty remarkable, actually. I love the feeling, and it makes me super grateful that I am able to house this little treasure inside my body.

Looking Forward to: Finding out the gender this week! And going on a babymoon to London this week! <-- We are heading across the pond for a dear friend's wedding, but we are treating this little baby-free getaway as our last big alone trip before we become parents of two. My oh my. The time is passing me by, friends!

Wearing:
BCBG Maxi Dress (old, I've linked to a few similar below)

Stevie and I are doing our best to be intentional as a family of 3 before things change this holiday season. We want Everett to know how special and loved he is, even with all the changes of a new sibling that are upon us. Any ideas on how to get the most out of being a family of three? Any fun ideas for special dates to do with a 2-year old?

A great thanks to Rachel Koontz, Eyesong Photography for taking these lovely photos of my family :)

10 Essentials for that 1st Trimester Survival.

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Pregnancy is the oddest experience.

I know I've done this once before, but this time around has been a brand-spanking new experience. Headaches for days, nausea that just won't quit, and a superpower called hormones that has made me that crazy pregnant lady.

More than once I have definitely found myself crying and frustrated at Stevie about something, and then a moment later I forgot what I was even upset about. Like, I forgot in the middle of the argument that I was trying to win. Craaaazzzyyy lady. Poor guy. He deserves a medal for this pregnancy go-round. But I must say, so do I.

The first trimester has definitely been more challenging than my last first trimester, and I've had to find some new tricks to make it through the days and months. Oh the lengthiness of the first tri. It's such a looooong time when you're exhausted and throwing up and headaching and you still have to feed your toddler and, you know, live. A few things that helped me this time around (even if some were strictly placebo-effect):

1. Sea Bands for nausea.
My amazing doula recommended that I try out Sea Bands for the intense nausea that came in those early weeks of pregnancy. Sometimes I felt like they immediately stopped the sea sick feeling, but sometimes the nausea persisted. They were really 50/50 for me, but I wore them throughout the beginning of my pregnancy, hoping that they were decreasing what could have been even worse nausea. I was willing to try anything!

2. Prenatals for energy.
I noticed an immediate difference in my energy level when I switched prenatal vitamins. I was so exhausted for the first trimester, but I felt a significant improvement when I started taking this Garden of Life RAW Prenatal along with the Garden of Life DHA. Game changer.

3. Sleep for sleep.
I had to nap every single day of my first trimester, and I am still napping a lot now. But I literally wouldn't have made it through the day if I hadn't slept as much as I did. Having a high-energy, busy toddler definitely didn't help in the energy department, so the moment I put him down in the afternoon, I hit the pillow. Only to wake up to his screaming when his nap was complete. Mine was never complete. I could put my head down on the desk now and just zzzzz....

4. Newton Labs Homeopathic Remedy for morning/all day sickness.
My sister swore by this little homeopathic remedy during her second pregnancy, and reminded me of it when I was so, so sick. I would take it in the morning, along with my other vitamins, and then take it as needed throughout the day when I felt the nausea increasing. A little tip - it absorbs into your body faster if you place the drops under your tongue! Per the advice of my naturopathic chiropractor.

5. Tracey Anderson: The Pregnancy Project for stretching/exercise.
I've shared about dear this amazing DVD set before, and I'll do it again. My first trimester was extremely hit or miss when it came to exercise, and I am just now getting back into the routine of moving a lot every week. But if you do this video you will stay suuuuuper toned. I love that she focuses on the pregnant body, and she is pregnant herself in the videos! And it's a great thing you can do at the house if it's too hot to go outside or you can't quite make it to the gym (hello, toddlerhood.)

6. Water + Coconut Water for headaches + hydration.
Because I battled with migraines and headaches during the first trimester, I had to be extra mindful to drink lots of water. Even when water tasted gross (because it totally did.) One way that I could get something hydrating into my system was loading down an enormous cup of ice and sliced lemons, and then pouring this coconut water over the top. It actually makes me a little nauseous to think about this concoction now, because I drank it so much when I was so sick. Oh the memories.

7. Support System for NEED.
I am so grateful I am living back home for this pregnancy. I don't know how I would have made it if I didn't have the help and support system of my family and friends here. On many occasions, my mom came over when I was having a migraine, or my sis-in-law would take Everett to play at her house, or my sister would make me toast and keep Everett occupied while I took a nap. It was seriously survival mode in this camp for a while. And I am so, so, SO grateful for these beautiful souls who kept my pregnancy a secret but checked in on me so lovingly for months on end. If you live without family around you, you can totally do it, but you just need to have a support system that you can count on when things get rough.

8. Preggie Pop Drops for nausea + metallic mouth.
Sometimes your mouth just tastes weird. I can't swear that these Preggie Pop Drops necessarily helped my nausea, but they sure tasted good and gave me something sour to suck on. My sweet friend Natalie sent these in the mail when she knew how sick I was, and every time I ate one of these I was reminded of her sweet thoughtfulness. This might be the one item that had a placebo affect versus a real affect, but it sure left a good taste in my mouth. Pun!!!

9. Stretchy Clothes for all that growing.
I pulled out my stored pregnancy box of clothing at about 6 weeks pregnant. No joke. Things have swollen up so much more quickly than the last time around, it's literally been overwhelming and shocking. I'll share a separate post on 1st tri clothes, but let me just say that you need some seriously stretchy pants (I've been loving these) and some comfy, non-constricting tops to bridge you from burger belly to "oh, there's a baby in there!"

10. Belly Balm for stretch marks.
I've readopted The Honest Company Belly Balm for this pregnancy. They've updated the formula and it's not quite so greasy as it used to be. It's a bit more creamy which works well when you want to apply it and then immediately get dresses afterwards. I didn't get belly stretch marks last time, but my hips and thighs tell a different story. I'm hoping not to gain any other new markage during this pregnancy - fingers crossed!

P.S. - Mamas, any 1st trimester survival tips that literally kept you going during those trying first months of pregnancy? I'd love to hear about them in the comments (and so would all the newly pregnant gals who are still in the early phases, hiding their pregnancy but looking for some relief!) xox

P.P.S. - My 1st Trimester Survival Guide, the last time around.

Christmas Gift.

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Even though I've had months to process this news, I still find myself asking, "Are we really ready for this again?" This quickly expanding body and oscillating emotional rush has been exciting, exhausting, and starkly different from the last time around. This first trimester was largely a season of coping for my little family. Stevie traveled for work a lot, Everett ate a lot more chicken nuggets than I like to admit, and I did a fair amount of throwing up. #tmi?

Everett has been working on his brotherhood skills. Like lifting up my dress in public to "see baby" and "hug baby".

Stevie has been wrapping his arms around my expanding middle and praying for this little one's future.

I've been eating bagels. It's been a lot of bagels, guys.

It's a very good question, "Are we really ready for this again?" I guess the answer doesn't really matter, because it's happening! God has a really good track record for knowing better than me and giving opulent gifts that I must navigate how to handle. You know when someone gives you something so much richer, fancier and more perfect than you could have ever given them? That's me, that's my God, and that's this little wonder inside of me. Everett is the magnificent proof that I can do this. I was clueless, dumbfounded and a little ridiculous, and somehow a story of motherhood has woven itself so wonderfully into my life by way of his vivacious presence.

And speaking of gifts, this baby in my belly is coming home for Christmas. :) Oh December, we anxiously await you!
 

Postpartum: Recovery Essentials

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Postpartum Recovery Essentials.

Having a baby. Oh my. There are some THINGS we women should be talking about.

For all you new mamas (and mothers-to-be!), I compiled a list of the essential items that really helped me through the first month of recovering from labor. The weeks after giving birth were really challenging, but I thought it would be difficult only because of the lack of sleep and learning how to take care of the baby. I had gone through an un-medicated 36 hour-long labor, so you can imagine that I thought the hard part was over once the baby was actually out. I had no idea that the recovery process for my own body would be just as demanding as caring for my new babe. There are so many things people don't tell you! So I wanted to pass along the few items that really helped me overcome the physical recovery process (even though at 8 weeks postpartum, I can tell you I am definitely still recovering!) For you single gals, I don't want to scare you... but maybe you don't need to read this until you're actually pregnant and prepping for your postpartum recovery experience. This post might seem a little too-TMI for you. However, once you become a mom, there is nothing off-limits when it comes to discussing bodily functions. You sort of lose that squeamish edge once you've had a dozen people watch your naked body contort in all the most unflattering of positions to actually birth a baby.

This info is geared towards those breastfeeding mamas recovering from a vaginal delivery, though I imagine some of this would be applicable no matter what type of birth experience you have. So without further adieu...

Wear Essentials:

Note: I covered some of theses items in  My Hospital Bag post.

- Nursing Tanks - I have been living in these Gillian O'Malley for Target Tanks and these Motherhood Maternity Seamless Nursing Camis (also, Jessica Simpson makes this awesome version with a built-in tummy tightener.) These tanks seriously make nursing so much easier and are super comfy. Also you don't need to wear a bra with them, SCORE.

- Nursing Bras - When you do have to go out and wear normal clothes, a nursing bra is a necessity. These can get pricey, which is why I did a happy dance when I found this extremely comfy, supportive (and affordable!) Gillian O'Malley nursing bra at Target. It doesn't have any underwire, so it's comfortable enough to sleep in and the easy snaps make it suuuuuper for nursing.

- Comfy Undies - These are to wear during the few weeks after you deliver the babe while your body is healing. I got a six pack similar to this at Target. You want to get a size that would fit you during your pregnancy (so a little larger than your normal, pre-preggo self) in dark colors. Don't invest too much here, you want something you don't mind tossing if they get ruined.

- Cozy PJs - You are going to be living in your pajamas for a while after giving birth, so make sure you're comfortable! I've been rocking a steady uniform of nursing tanks, yoga pants and a gorgeously soft robe that Stevie gifted me with for Easter this year. These items have been my comfort during the first few weeks/months of nursing with Everett. When your hormones are raging during postpartum, your temperature fluctuates a lot! Be ready to shed layers and then put them right back on. Having something cozy to wear around the house has been a delight.

- Danskin Waist Trimmer Belt - This was loaned to me by my darling sister-in-law Katie, who swears this helped her get her midsection back after her first baby. I wore it interchangeably with my Bellaband during the first two weeks postpartum. I know it takes a lot of time to get your body back after a baby, and mine isn't anywhere close to what it used to be. But I like to think that making this little effort will help?

Healing & Recovery Essentials:

- Silhouette Depends - Don't cry. You won't have to wear these forever. But during the first several weeks after the baby is born, yeah. These are things I wish someone would have told me. So when you send your husband out to the store to pick up your baby's diapers, make sure he grabs a pack of your diapers too. Seriously, you've got to stop crying.

- Poise Ultimate Absorbency Pads - These pads are pretty much the most giant, super absorbent, overnight kind of pad on the market. The nurses at the hospital taught me to layer these inside the Depends. And I've never felt so sexy.

- Tucks Witch Hazel Pads - These are really cooling and comforting for the nether regions, whether you are healing up with stitches or dealing with post-labor hemorrhoids (yep, that's also a thing). Layer them in your pads, within your Depends, and you're good to go. (I'm pretty sure this method is how Stella got her groove back.) I know, you're tears are probably raging at this point. Just power through.

- Perineal Bottle - Hopefully the hospital will give you one of these. It helps clean your "down there" area when its too tender to wipe.

- Sitz Bath - Again, I'm sure your hospital will send you home with this little device, and you should do the sitz bath at least once a day for the first several weeks postpartum. It will help everything heal up just right. Little tip: I HATED taking a sitz bath. So to encourage the full 10 minutes that I just had to sit there... I painted my nails. I had some GOOD nails going in the first few weeks postpartum. Silver lining?

- Smooth Move Tea - Bless my dear doula. She brought this tea to me a day after I got home from the hospital and it works. Helped move my digestion along, since everything slows way down after birthing a baby.

- Probiotic Supplement - I started taking this Jarro-Dophilus supplement when I was pregnant, and my midwife recommended I stay on it while I'm breastfeeding (especially since my little one has a super sensitive tummy.)

- A SHOWER - I swear by this one. Taking a shower everyday is not only good for keeping your body clean so it heals up well... but I truly think it will help you keep sane. I loved taking a shower everyday (and I still do!) even if I wasn't going anywhere and if the only person I saw all day was my little baby. A shower just makes me feel like myself again.

Breastfeeding Essentials:

-  Honest Co. Nipple Balm - THIS STUFF IS GOLD. Seriously, if I can recommend any product, this is it! This balm is like magic for the nips. It's made of completely natural, food-grade ingredients so it's safe for baby.

- Lasinoh Disposable Nursing Pads - These are dumb, but you have to use them. You don't want to milk all over the place. Which totally happens. Yeah, the good times keep on rolling.

- Lasinoh Soothies Breast Pads - I was ready to raise the white flag at one point, because initially breastfeeding is just so painful. These little guys helped me power through. I couldn't believe how fast they worked! Within a day I was feeling an enormous sense of relief.

- Milkmaid Nursing Pillow - I have been SO pleased with this nursing pillow, especially after trying a few others. The design, the materials used, the shape - it's all SO perfect for nursing the baby, whether bottle feeding or breastfeeding. It has kept my back from wearing out completely, because breastfeeding can be super exhausting.

- Mothers Milk Tea - This tea promotes lactation, which is helpful when trying to build up your milk supply. I thought it would taste awful, but it doesn't! It's got a smooth, peppermint-y flavor, and I've been trying to drink it once a day just to keep my milk flowin'. Yes.

- Hylands Baby Colic Tablets - My baby has a sensitive tummy, and these tablets have really helped calm him down when he wails. I feel so so bad for him because I can feel his stomach tense up (he gets really gassy), so while I am trimming my diet down to really bland foods, I have also been giving him these homeopathic tablets to calm his tummy. They really work!

- Water - This one may seem simple, but its seriously so essential. You body is going to be flushing out fluids over the coming weeks, and its super important to re-hydrate so that you can make milk, etc. It won't be hard though - you will be waking up in the middle of the night sweating and thirsty! Keep a bottle of water with you at all times and keep filling it up throughout the day.

Other Essentials:

- HELP! - I have been overwhelmingly blessed to be surrounded by so much family during my postpartum process. Being surrounding by loved ones during this incredible experience created a safe environment for me to make mistakes, cry and slowly figure "it" out. And also, it's wondrous to have someone cook you a bit of breakfast, do a few (or in my case, ALL) loads of laundry, clean up your bathroom, and just help out in the areas where you need it! I am so indebted to my sister and mom, it's not even funny. They were lifesavers.

- Talking - I am still mentally and emotionally processing the birth of my son. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. Talking to people really, really helps. I have spent hours discussing the different aspects of the birth with my amazing husband, my mom (who is also a certified life coach, SCORE!), and my precious friend and doula, Liz. I truly believe that having a birth experience that differs from your expectations, coupled with the raging hormones, can contribute to postpartum depression. While I am still overcoming different "road blocks" in my mind, having continued support has really helped me avoid plummeting into those darker places. I am so, so grateful that they have been willing to re-hash the birth with me so that I can talk it through and gain some inner-healing.

- Meals - My darling friend Tricia organized a Meal Train using Take Them A Meal, and let me tell you what, IT WAS AMAZING. Having a schedule of folks who were willing to bless us with a meal was so incredibly helpful during those first few weeks. I still don't have the capacity or desire to cook anything, so having that meal support was another thing that I didn't have to worry about. Thank you to everyone who blessed us with such yummy food!

- Sleep - I have been especially bad about napping. But it is honestly the thing that heals you up the MOST. It's been personally hard for me to nap because my son doesn't like napping during the day (yeah, I KNOW), but anytime the baby goes down, I should be napping too. You don't get brownie points for staying awake and doing laundry. Just freakin' TAKE A NAP. Your body is craving it so badly. And you will need those power naps to get you through the day and those endless nights. Believe me.

A Few Resources:

Reading through these other blog posts really encouraged me during the healing process.

Postpartum Must-Haves for Mommies

Body After Baby: What to Expect After You Deliver

Making it Through the Last Month of Pregnancy

You Can Do This!

I hope all of this helps with your recovery. It feels like an eternity when you're in the midst of it, but those little babies grow and change SO much from week to week. Believe me, your body, mind and heart will be changing and healing, too! Give yourself lots of time to recover, give yourself grace when you feel like you aren't measuring up, and let go of comparisons and expectations. Everyone heals at a different pace because everyone's birth story is unique to them. But these sweet newborn moments are fleeting - you never get the beginning back again! So soak it up!

For those who have already gone through labor and delivery, are there any tips or products that helped during postpartum? I'd love to hear about what worked for you. Feel free to comment below!

A Final Bumpdate.

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//Top: 10 weeks, 13 weeks, 16 weeks // Middle: 17 weeks, 20 weeks, 22 weeks // Bottom: 22 weeks, 24 weeks, 31 weeks //

// Top: 26 weeks, 30 weeks, 34 weeks // Middle: 34 weeks, 35 weeks, 36 weeks // Bottom: 36 weeks, 37 weeks, 37.5 weeks //

A Final Bumpdate.

I can't believe my pregnancy journey is over. Everett has been on my mind every single day since I saw those two lines form on the test. And now? I'm fascinated looking back over these silly selfies. I'm amazed at how significantly my body changed to accommodate my sweet son. Suddenly being on the other side of this journey is so strange. One day, everything just reverses. The burgeoning belly expands until it, literally, pops, and then begins its descent back to "normal" (oh geez, what is a normal body after baby??)

Now, being in the throws of motherhood, it's easy to move on quickly from the pregnancy experience and dive headfirst into baby development. But today, I had to take a moment to reflect on the beautiful and absurd experience that is pregnancy. I'm finally able to feel truly proud of what my body created and nurtured for 9 months. And I feel an entirely new appreciation for the vocation of motherhood, and especially, my incredible mother.

What women do for their children is remarkable. It's so, so hard. And it's the most thankless kind of job. I mean, my 7-week old baby just doesn't wake up thanking me for the hard work. The diapering, feeding, cooing, singing, bouncing, and all the asinine attempts to comfort his sobbing. Perhaps one day? Yeah, I know, dream on. But it's been this experience that has caused me to go back to my own mother, thanking her profusely, finally realizing a teensy, tiny sliver of how selflessly she gave to me all those years... and how she is still doing it. Giving, advising, disciplining, helping, teaching, growing me. I feel so grateful, so incredibly indebted and a tiny bit ashamed of those past immature moments when I found myself angry with her, accused her of "not understanding". Was I so blind? I know now. I have been on her mind for my entire life, plus nine months before that.

Now I see why this motherhood thing is such a complex, all-encompassing, never-ever-ending journey. It's the deep end of the womanhood pool. It's an extension of the most challenging and life-giving experiences one can have. All my poignant milestones, those moments of victory & triumph, those challenging battles & overcoming mountains - they weren't just for my own gain. They're the foundation for my own babe to build upon. It's my responsibility to take the most powerful, strong parts of myself, lay them at the feet of my son, and simply say, "Take what's mine, go and be greater." Which is awfully hard to do, because I feel so inadequately prepared. So unready. But I'm finding that the most gracious & authentic way to approach this motherhood thing is to just. Come. Undone.

And I'm only 7 weeks in.

Now I have to go rescue my crying baby from, you guessed it, my own mother. Because she held him the entire time I processed and wrote this post this morning. GO THANK YOUR MOM TODAY. Because wow.