How to Identify Abdominal Separation After Pregnancy.

/

Hi friends! My fitness inspiration friend Kate from BeyondFit Mom is back with another awesome post-pregnancy post, this time focusing on the abs :) Since I am eager to get back to exercising again, I figure I'm not the only postpartum mom who is a little stumped about the "safe" way to return to a work out regimen. I'm grateful that Kate is here to share her tips about how to repair the abs after giving birth.

What is Diastasis Recti?
A diastasis recti is a separation of the abdominal muscles, what many refer to as the “six-pack” muscles. This separation occurs along the band of connective tissue that runs down the middle of the rectus abdominis. This band of tissue is called “the linea alba, but we’re going to refer to it as the “midline.”

Some degree of abdominal separation will always occur during pregnancy. This is because everyone’s core muscles have to expand to give room for the baby to grow! During pregnancy, separation occurs down the midline as a result of the force of the uterus pushing against the wall of the abdomen coupled with the influx of pregnancy hormones that soften connective tissue.

60% of pregnancies the abdominal separation will be wider than 2 – 2.5 finger widths apart and you will be considered to have diastasis recti. Diastasis recti can occur anytime in the last half of pregnancy, but most commonly occurs after pregnancy when the abdominal wall is lax and the thinner midline tissue no longer provides adequate support for the torso and internal organs.

A small amount of widening of the midline happens in all pregnancies and is normal. In many cases this abdominal separation, also known as diastasis recti, will heal naturally post birth with no medical intervention, however, for many, the tissue remains too wide. A midline separation of more than 2 to 2.5 finger-widths, or 2 centimeters, is considered problematic.

What’s the Problem with a Diastasis Recti?
A diastasis recti can lead to pelvic instability due to abdominal wall weakness. This instability can create a number of problems.

These include:
- Abdominal discomfort with certain movements, such as rolling over in bed, getting in/out of bed, and lifting heavy objects
- Umbilical hernia
- Pubic symphysis pain
- Sacroiliac joint pain
- Low back pain
- Pelvic floor dysfunctions, such as urinary, fecal and flatulence incontinence and pelvic organ prolapse

In addition, a diastasis recti can change the appearance of the abdomen. The skin may droop, and some patients may even develop an actual hernia through the midline.

Also, some moms may complain of continuing to look pregnant…. Even YEARS after having their baby.

How to know if you have Diastasis Recti...
1. Lay on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the floor.
2. Exhale and lift your head and shoulders off the floor – put one hand behind your head to support your neck.
3. Make sure you contract your rectus abdomens muscle – bring your rib cage closer to your hips, rather than just bringing up your head.
4. Place your fingers in a horizontal position across your belly button and feel above, over and below the belly button. Assess the width and depth of the gap. It is also relevant if there is a gap how firm or loose the sheath under the belly button feels.

Diastasis Recti Warning
The urge to return to traditional ab exercises like crunches, may be strong when you feel like you’re ready to workout again after having a baby, but if you have diastasis recti, you must be cautious about what time of abdominal exercises you return to.

Always be sure you’re engaging your transverse abdominal and be very wary of any ab exercises that increase the intra-abdominal pressure.

Intra-abdominal pressure is the real problem behind diastasis recti and the “mommy tummy”.

Pushing your body too far, or rushing into hardcore ab exercises could be doing more harm than it does good if you have diastasis recti.

Avoid: Any exercise that will cause your abdominal wall to bulge out upon exertion.

NOTE: If at any point through your workout you notice signs of core weakness, please consider a modification until the entire workout can be completed without any of the following:

- If you are straining from within your abdomen or pelvic floor during the exercise
- If you leak urine when doing any of the exercises
- If you notice pelvic or lower back pain during or after the exercise
- If you feel unstable in the core during the exercise
- If there is bulging or “coning” in your abdomen during the exercise

There you have it! Any questions you have or advice you can lend about your own experience with diastasis recti and postpartum fitness? I'd love to hear from you!

Many thanks to Kate for this one! You can follow her on instagram for fitness tips, encouragement and accountability :)

P.S. - Kate's 5 Fitness Tips for Postpartum Moms and the 5 Ways I Make Time for Exercise.

3 Ways to Style Unwashed Hair.

/

I am so grateful to the lovely Lauren, blogger over at Blissful Happenings and momprenuer at Rocco+Norah, for guest posting here today. As I take some time with my new baby love, I am sharing some posts from esteemed and treasured blogging friends, and Lauren is one of those! So excited to feature her witty voice (+ hair hacks) here!

As a general rule of thumb I only wash my hair once a week. I'd like to say that it has something to do with creating texture and not overworking and drying out my hair... and while that's got some to do with it, the whole "keeping a toddler and infant alive" is really more to blame. Also, did I mention I'm lazy and tired?! Yeah, that too.

Now I know your thinking this boo is cray, she must wear her hair up all the time and to that I say a resounding NOPE. In fact, I rarely wear my hair up even on the dirty and oiliest of days. Don't get me wrong I love a good mom bun, but here are my 3 go to styles.

1. Dry shampoo and side swipe.
My dirty flipped hair would make Kristen Stewart herself proud. This is my go to with hair that's a little bit oily, but not yet a hot mess. So the key to using your dry shampoo is spraying said shampoo into small flipped over sections of hair at least a foot away. Then let set and pat out any residue. Continue on to the next flipped section. Then choose a good section to make a hard part and flip over. The whole point is to have it look like you didn't try. If you must, throw on the curling wand and touch up the front pieces, but remember this is not about looking perfect. Think quinessential French messy hair!!

2. Half up top knot.
So once I can no longer handle the greasy side swipe I graduate to a Lil' top knot. I've recent chopped off all of my hair, but I loved this when my hair was waist length too because it was out of my face without the weight of 300 pounds of hair. I think this is the cutest and so easy to do. Take a section of all of the hair that gets in your way, you can make a small triangle from the crown of your head if you wanna get fancy. Twist. Secure with 2-3 hairpins. I prefer them to bobby pins. The trick is that you don't just toss in a pin straight, you start at a 45 degree angle pointing down and then once in the hair pull the pin up and wiggle it in so it gets lodged in the hair! Magic.

3. Hair Accessories.
Lastly, I would be remiss if I didn't include my beloved turbans and hats. I love a good hair accessory and I couldn't do life without them. Hats. Hats. Hats. I love hats. I know some people get nervous at the thought, you just can't "pull them off"... my response, pish posh. Everyone can wear hats you just have to find one that fits and fake it until you make it. I promise a handful of times out of the house in a hat and you too will be hat person. I love ball caps, fedoras, wide brim, etc. basically all hats. I also love a fab little turban. Rocco + Norah mama turbans are basically my jam. (shameless plug) they look adorable and give you that I'm so chic and bohemian vibe that no one will be noticing your less than vibrant (ahem, dirty as all get out) locks.

Thanks for checking out my post. Hope this can help you through those trying days where your hair is the least of your cares or worries. #momlife, you've got this boos!!! To see more of my messy hair check out my Instagram and my (sometimes) blogging over at Blissful Happenings.

5 Ways To Celebrate Christmas For Free (or on the Cheap!)

/

Hi sweet friends. As I take some time with my new baby love, I will be sharing some posts from esteemed and treasured blogging + entrepreneur friends. Today I'm excited to introduce you to my friend Jessica Huffman, certified StrengthsFinder life coach, personal stylist and most importantly - mama, sister and friend! She's here to share some super clever ideas for how to celebrate Christmas without inflating the budget.

“It’s the most wonderful time of the year…”

That memorable classic serenades you in stores, shopping malls, and on the radio as the details of your to-do list pile up in your head. If you’re a mom, the tantalizing thoughts of parties, delicious food, and family tradition can easily be overshadowed by what it takes to obtain those “Instagram worthy" moments. In the motherhood hustle, it’s all too easy to forget to stop, breathe, and be present. If you haven’t given yourself permission yet, consider this blog your first form of encouragement to “lower the bar” on experiencing the holiday season with your loved ones. Say no to the next kids’ holiday party (you’ve attended 25 already), hit “decline” on that Ugly Sweater Facebook invite your cousin throws (it has terrible food anyway), and throw off the constraints of “have-to” demands in favor of the “get-to” moments you can savor with your family during Christmas. Most of the best ones are usually free, too!

Now look, if you are wanting perfection this holiday season then keep looking for some other airbrushed and poised mom and her kids, because this girl ain’t that! I’m real, honest, and on a mission to live my best life now; even embracing the terrible (my word of the year!) moments along the way. If you are like me (I’m not so secretly hoping you are… flawlessly popping another M&M in our mouths while we compare ourselves to strangers on the internet) then this season is about memories and experiences that will create fond memories of our family for years. Instead of chaos, opt for creativity; instead of maxing out credit cards, aim for simplicity and engagement. You might just find that it is TRULY the most wonderful time of the year! Below are my Five Ways to Celebrate The Holidays for Free (or almost free)!

1. Christmas Scavenger Hunt.
Do you like riddles? Then you can create your own “Christmas Scavenger Hunt.” If not, you can find a variety of great riddles very easily on Pinterest. What to do: Start the evening with dinner. After dinner organize the group into pairs (try and pair a child with an adult). Give each pair the list of riddles that, when solved, identify an item for them to take a picture or video of. Load everyone up in the cars and take them to an outdoor/indoor mall, local hotspot, or even a large department store that has a variety of Christmas themed items and people (Santa, Elves, Live Nativity Scene, etc.). Whoever finishes the list first must rush to get it back to a pre-determined spot and can be declared the winner, with total bragging rights (you guessed it…I am a terrible loser!) After everyone returns, celebrate with either hot chocolate or a dessert! This game is perfect for team work, cultivating healthy competition, and can be educational depending on what you learn from each riddle and clue.

2. Christmas Home Spa.
At the end of the day, make a mock schedule for the “(FAMILY NAME) SPA.” Set aside 30 minute increments for each child. Let them know that they have 5 minutes to prep for the spa in one of your bathrooms that has a bathtub. Run some water, grab bubbles, bath bombs, oils or any special bath toys (depending on age). Lower the lights, and then have each child request their favorite holiday movie on Netflix, Amazon Prime, etc. Set up a laptop or iPad on an end table close to the tub but far enough away that it can’t be harmed by playful splashes. When your child arrives for their spa time, hand them a cup of hot chocolate, ask them to get in the spa and then press play on their holiday movie. Of course safety is key so, as the parent, determine the level of safety each child needs in a bath full of water. If you need to stay close, this might be the perfect opportunity to sit nearby on the floor, fold laundry, and watch your child become a diva in training.

3. Christmas “Tour De Subdivision”.
Often times, the most wonderful memories are the traditional ones that have a unique spin. When I was a child we would go look at lights in the surrounding neighborhoods. As I grew older, the family ventured out into other towns. Today, my family carries on this tradition with some added elements. The trick to this is introducing an element of surprise. For example, on an evening when your kids least expect it, have them prepare for bed in their warm pajamas. Just before bed announce that, instead of the same old routine, the family is going to have a Christmas surprise! Pile everyone up in the car with plenty of blankets, roll down the windows, and make your first stop any place that serves ice cream. Crank the holiday music as the kids enjoy their late night treat and slowly drive through your local subdivisions ohhhh-ing and ahhhh-ing at the lights. Make sure you turn off your headlights (if you can) for an even more dramatic impact. Don’t forget that this can be either long or short depending on the ages of your kid’s. As you gaze at the lights ask your kids questions. For example:

1. Which type of lights do you love the most - icicle, colored, white, blinking, etc.

2. Which one was your favorite home (of lights) and why?

4. Twelve Days of Christmas - Book Edition.
Create a simple calendar system for the 12 days leading up to Christmas. Let the kids know you will be reading a holiday book of their choice each night together prior to bed (or when it works best for the family). Visit your local library and have each child pick out the books that are geared towards the Christmas season. On your return home, place each child’s name and book in the schedule day. Once you have your pre-determined time each day, let each child know it’s his/her day to pick their books and favorite spot to read. Make sure that the family knows this is done together each day so there’s no options or excuses not to sit and enjoy the book of choice.

5. Hot Chocolate Tasting!
This might not be free, but it is still cost effective and super engaging. It can be a good choice for a large family or even a friends/family outing. Set aside at least a three hour window of time on a predetermined a day. Select a driving route that takes you to at least three places that sell hot chocolate. Create a “Hot Chocolate” evaluation form where the name, location, and type of hot chocolate can we written down. Include a list of numbers to rate taste, creaminess, whip cream, etc. At each stop, ask for the small or kids size hot chocolate and then remind everyone to sip slowly (almost like wine, but that would be encouraging drinking and that’s not what this blog is about) and then talk about and write down how much they like/dislike it and why. Proceed on to the next location instructing everyone to do the same thing for each stop. At the last location, ask them to either choose their top pick for hot chocolate or decide together on a team “winner!”

A little more about Jessica:
I'm a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, grace dweller, burrito lover, Netflix watcher, coffee consumer, and style obsessor. After 15 years in the non-profit arena, life choices thrusted me in to what felt like a mid-life crisis to what became an adventurous journey of answering the question, “What Now”? Traveling to DC to get my StrengthsFinder certification from Gallup, and attempting the Personal Stylist/Branding program with Sterling Style Academy, my struggle became my passion, and with this new venture, will become my purpose: helping others discover a life and work they love!

I hope you enjoyed Jessica's savvy holiday hacks and make sure to visit her site and give a shout out on her instagram!

You're Still You (Guest Post with Lauren from Blissful Happenings!)

/

Today I have a special treat for you. I'm sharing a guest post, courtesy of Lauren from Blissful Happenings, a blog about motherhood and fashion. She is a fellow mama and blogger, the big sis of my best friend from from my middle school days, and has recently relocated back to the East Coast from sunny Southern California. She has a little rugrat around Everett's age, and today we are taking over each others blogs, sharing some thoughts about the same subject - motherhood and identity! Be sure to show her some love and leave a comment below, letting her know what you think about her post!

There have been a few times in my life when I wasn’t sure who I was, wistfully floating from thing to thing unsure of my purpose or meaning. I’ve always been concerned with what I was “supposed to be doing”... my calling, if you will. Deep, I know. 

Being young is not all that it’s cracked up to be. I was never more unsure of myself than when I was younger. Luckily, maturity and time fixed that. In my early 20’s I moved away from the vast majority of my friends and family and I was left in a place so distracted and lost I barely recognized myself. In my case, new friendships, passions, and renewed faith ignited a confidence that helped squish the voices in my head that told me I wasn’t worthy of happiness. After years spent gaining said confidence, I worked towards a daily goal of being happy in the moment with who I was and where I was... and then I had a baby. 

As someone who would’ve never in a million years thought they’d identify as a stay at home mom, it’s easy to feel isolated after having a baby, to feel like you’re the only person going through this crap... literally, there are days you are covered in crap. You feel like your eye cream has taken a vacation because even your bags have bags. More likely, you’ve just forgot to order more or it’s possible you’ve never even opened the last bottle you ordered because you’re so tired you don’t remember the last time you washed your face.  Ahhh yes, I see you nodding in agreement. You get it. How does one stay true to who they are when they have put themselves last? Oh, you want me to answer now? Is that how this works? I guess in my limited knowledge of raising a tiny human I would say I’ve learned a few things about keeping my identity whole and mostly intact, do with it what you will. 

You do you boo boo. That hasn’t changed. You MUST do the things you love. Read, write, sing, create, dream! Why in the world should a kid stop you!? If anything, having a baby has opened my eyes to more amazing things than I could have ever imagined! How can you make, carry, and birth a baby and not believe in dreams? Now, this might be a good time to discuss managing expectations. It’s not all your time anymore! Can I get an AMEN!? But it’s about what you do with the time you do have! 

Be social. Get out and have lunch or breakfast or coffee, find whatever mealtime your nugget[s] are the most behaved and generally the least difficult and plan the heck out of them! Go on walks, plan play dates, do things that have you hanging around other ah-mazing mothers who get it! Loneliness is a killer of happiness, my friends, so isolation is NEVER the answer. 

Cry and eat Thin Mints. I recently read this article that was talking about how all these “honest” mommy posts popping up on the internet were killing the American family... Yeah. Seriously. And yes, it was written by a man. I was ready to do some face punching. Because let’s face it, being a mom is hard!!!! Raising a kid is freaking hard! And I won’t let anyone tell me that I need to censor that! I don’t ever want anyone, especially a new mom, thinking it’s possible to have it all figured out. No mom, no matter how together she seems, knows it all. She cries in her closet with Thin Mints and a glass of wine too.

Your life is irrevocably changed after you have a baby and that is okay. Accept it. Just remember at the end of the day, you are doing an amazing job! And if all you can muster is Netflix and yoga pants then you allow yourself that, but remember being a mom doesn’t make you any less you. You’re still you, just different...

Many thanks to Lauren for sharing her heart and encouragement about motherhood. Be sure to check out Lauren's blog, Blissful Happenings, and today you can see a post from yours truly about the same subject! Tons of love to you, friends!