Coin Jar Date Night.

It litters the bottom of your purse. It hides in the couch, lurks in the junk drawer, and waits in the nooks and crannies of your car. It accumulates. It gets shuffled around. It's rather filthy.

It's change. And you have more of it than you think.

We've been collecting our coins for a few years now. There is a glass jar in our pantry, and we toss coins in every now and then when we actually think about it. Otherwise the change filters into the recesses of our home and lies in wait like Gollum's ring. Since I have an almost-crawler on my hands, I am frantically trying to clean out my house and get rid of anything excessive that my little boy will most definitely want to put into his teething mouth. This decluttering sparked a great idea. I'd like to be able to take credit for it, but I'll admit that it was Stevie's brilliant idea:

Why don't we take all the coins in the jar (which had turned into two jars), and use the money to go on a date?

We set the rules - we could only use the cash in the jars. No extra spending. So if it was $15 or $50, that was all the money we could use on the date. We drove our golf cart (no gas needed, so no $ spent there), and we went to the local Kroger where there is a Coinstar. If you aren't familiar with Coinstar, it's one of those kiosks where you can dump your change in and it counts it for you and then gives you a ticket to take to the cashier, where you collect your moola. Of course, Coinstar takes a pretty percentage (almost 12%!!!), but I wasn't going to take the time to roll all the coins and take them into the bank. Hello, I have two children. So Coinstar took its commission and I was very fine with it.

So we went on our coin jar date! Coinstar counted our two jars of change and awarded us $43.81, which we decided to use at our favorite local Mexican restaurant. Thankfully, our waitress was a doll and let us ask her really annoying questions about the pricing of everything - we just wanted to make sure we weren't over-ordering so we could still leave enough to tip her 20%! Oh math. It wasn't my strong suit in school. Thank goodness for Stevie's brain - he calculated up front and we were able to order everything we wanted! Guacamole, drinks (margarita for him, sparkly water for me - I'm not drinking alcohol right now), and then fajitas for the two of us. It was sooooo good. And really fun and funny.

This date reminded me of the early days when we were married and living on very little. Our first year of marriage we were both in ministry school in California and working part-time jobs, so we lived on a tight budget and there was obviously very little extra for extravagant dates. Back then one of our standard Friday night dates was go to Chipotle, split a burrito (but we each got our own chips and guac - I don't share guac), and then go next store to Jamba Juice and each get our own smoothie. We would take everything to go and then head home and binge-watch Jack Bauer saving the country on 24. This was in the days before Netflix, and certainly before the practice of "Netflix and chill". Those times were challenging in a lot of ways, but now when I look back, I am so glad that we had those experiences. We were super budgeted and we still found ways to laugh and date and enjoy our life together, sans shopping and extras. Nowadays we aren't living that tight, but this date reminded me of those sweet early days when we were just kids, starting out and trying to live responsibly and take good care of each other. Now we have babies and a mortgage and we are pretending to be grown-ups - life has gone by so fast!

This was a really fun idea and I think we are going to try to make it an annual thing - our coin jar date night! I dare you to join me - if you decide to give it a try, make sure to post about it on instagram and tag me, along with #coinjardatenight. It will be fun to see what you're able to do with all the money found in between your couch cushions, don't you think?

P.S. - Just wanted to mention that this post isn't sponsored by Kroger or Coinstar (although I wish - I spend half my life at Kroger).

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Outfit Details:
Gap Midi Skirt, Banana Republic Tank, Lucky Wedge Heels, Banana Republic Scarf c/o, Banana Republic Clutch c/o,
Stella & Dot Alila Cuff

The fastest weekend in Mobile, Alabama!

We spent the quickest, most refreshing weekend in Mobile, Alabama! My bff Natalie and her husband Darin operate a Chick-fil-A there (if you live in Mobile, go see them! 3244 Dauphin Street!), and I really wanted to visit and see her life there. We have grown up together and remained close since we were 12 years old. She's one of my oldest friends and the dearest kind of soul - she listens so well and keeps an incredibly open mind about things, which is something that is a rare treasure in a friend. She always gives a balanced opinion and sound advice, and has been a steadfast friend through the ups and downs that the years have brought. Over the past year, I think I had more surprise Amazon deliveries from her than I ordered for my own family - because she knows that gifts are my love language. What a thoughtful, generous, loyal gem of friend she is. And I'm not an idiot; if you have a friend this good, you hold onto her for dear life! I am grateful grateful grateful for her sweet self.

Everett fell head over heels for Miss Natalie when he was a baby. He always looked at her with these big puppy eyes and would actually stop crying when she was near him (which is more than I can say about myself - oh, the years of crying Everett...) So he was super amped to visit her. He loved her cats.

We had grand plans to explore Mobile over the course of the weekend, perhaps even trekking over to the blessed town of Fairhope (a southern treasure, and most certainly worth the drive if you ever get the chance!), but it ended up pouring rain the whole weekend. Which you know what? Was kind of wonderful. Her home is on the water and is the kind of place that has that dreamy, lived-in, warm southern charm. A brick archway, woven rugs, distressed furniture and carefully chosen antiques - her home should be photographed! It's truly a wonder. I loved curling up on her soft couch and clutching my coffee cup and listening to the rain fall while catching up on everything going on in her heart. Our husbands wrangled my children (and a few cats) while they played ping pong and talked dude things.

I am usually a hard-core traveler, eager to see (and eat) as much as possible that is local and charming. But this was a different trip, a time to revel in the goodness of a well-worn friendship and feel at home with the heart of my dear girl.

I will say that when the sun came out for a few hours, we had the chance to wander through the famed Charles Phillips Antiques, a local dealer that imports his goods from all over Europe. It was mesmerizing, being taken back in time and surrounded by thousands of flourished french doors and heavy steamer trunks, cases of glass bottles and stacks of letters from World War II. Every item is steeped in history, emanating stories from a past age. It was rather intimate, rifling through someone else's jewelry boxes, torn recipes, tool bins and office supplies. I was overwhelmed by the experience, and found myself tearing up as we walked to our car to leave. I couldn't even buy anything, I didn't know how to choose. It's definitely the kind of place that you want to visit if you're furnishing a house. But bring a trailer on the back of your car, this stuff is amazing.

I'm feeling more and more like myself everyday. My postpartum experience this time around has really challenged me, and I am grateful that people like Natalie have been patient with me as I've come back to myself. Spending such a rich time with this girl who is truly family to me made my heart happy. It's a rare thing, to have a friend this good. If you're reading this and one of your dear girlfriends comes to mind today, send her a text or a quick letter in the mail! Who doesn't love hearing from their dear old friend, just for the heck of it? Lots of love to all of you today, friends! xox

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Unfortunately my romper is sold out and my kimono is past season, but I linked to a few similar styles :)

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10 Years.

10 years with this man.

I remember when I was getting married at the ripe old age of 19, I was asked by a lot of my friends - "How do you know that he's the one you will want forever? What if you both change?" It was a good question, since I was obviously so young and he was, too (he was 23). The question made me think, but it didn't scare me. I knew in my gut Stevie was the right one for me, and always would be.

I am wrong about a lot of things (don't tell my kids), but I was right about him.

After having spent the past decade together, I can honestly say it's been the best season of my life. Our marriage is far from perfect - we've experienced highs and lows in our connection with each other - but I am more convinced than ever that he is the one I want to work through issues with, celebrate victories with, and share my life with. He's absolutely amazing.

I've been thinking a lot about that question, though. How can you choose to be with someone forever when you don't know how you (and they) will change through the years? I think this is one of the big reasons why people don't get married - they want to be so sure about the choice.

But you can't be so sure.

Because you will absolutely change. And so will they.

I don't know how other people do marriage, and I don't claim to be any kind of expert, but I have definitely learned my fair share of love lessons over the past ten years. Choosing to marry someone isn't about remaining the same together. It's about choosing to grow together. Choosing to allow each other to grow, and choosing to let your spouse have the freedom and independence to continue to evolve. You have to trust that they will evolve in a way that continues to put your marriage first - that's the kicker. And the only way to ensure that they will put you first is when you model it by putting them first. It's counter-culture in so many ways. Our society tells us to put ourselves first, especially in this age of women coming into their own power. I love female empowerment and I am so grateful to be living in this time when I can dream and achieve anything in my heart, but the thing is - that's not the way it works in marriage. The best thing I can do in my marriage is sacrifice, and put Stevie first. Trusting that he's doing the exact same thing for me. When we are both sacrificing for each other, both of our dreams have the freedom and support to flourish. It's like this spectacularly fragile and balanced dance of giving.

An example: When Stevie and I got engaged, he was dreaming of going to get his MBA at a top school. I knew that it was something in his heart, and that if we got married, at some point he was going to want to pursue that path. I loved that about him - his drive and brains and heart to actually want to take tests. I thought he was a dork, but a good-looking one. His journey of applying and getting into Harvard was one of the most exciting experiences for us - and those two years we spent in Boston were phenomenal. They were hard, fantastic, sometimes awful, almost always freezing cold, and completely wonderfully bonding. And I am so proud of him, that he really went for it. I did everything in my power, changing around my college schedule, taking classes in Boston, adjusting my job at Chick-fil-A, finding a new job downtown, everything I could, to make his dream possible. And it was totally, totally worth it. Not only was it an amazing experience for us as a couple, but we made some of the best friends of our life. We are forever changed by that path.

He's done the same for me. When we were living in Atlanta and I was in college, I was spending my weekends and week night margins acting. I was taking late-night classes, practicing scenes with my partners, making short films and commercials, performing at showcases and conventions - wherever I could get experience and resume-builders. Stevie was always supportive, making me dinner so that I could eat at midnight when I got home. He was front row with flowers when I was performing. He was the one giving me constructive criticism when I asked for it (even though I didn't really want to hear it). We moved to New York City after he graduated with his MBA so that I could pursue my dream of acting as a profession. I spent so much time on the subway, going to and from auditions, classes, networking events, more auditions. Stevie was my biggest fan, running lines with me, whole-heartedly investing in gear and headshots and classes and whatever else I needed to go for it. He has put me first throughout our 10 years together, and I am so thankful that he put my dreams first, too. I would always regret it if I hadn't really given it my all in that season of life, when I had those opportunities before me.

Now that we have kids, we are living another dream. I am so grateful to be raising my two little boys with this man that I so respect and love. I know we have a lot more dreams that have yet to come into fruition, a lot of seasons ahead of us and so much more to learn in our journey together. I am so excited to pursue those things with him, because I trust his heart for me is good. He's safe and yet wildly adventurous. I am a lucky, lucky girl.

Marriage is a choice of faith - having faith in that person. Faith that they will make the best choices for themselves and for you. I am so grateful to share this life with him. It's not easy (marriage counseling, y'all - everyone should get some!), but it's one of the things I am most proud of. Thank you for loving me so well, Stevie! You're a keeper! There is no one else I would rather travel with, cook for, make babies with, laugh at or dream with! I loooooooove you.

P.S. Tonight we are going OUT. #parentsgonewild

Oh Father, my Father.

My dad is quite a man. He has a frightening sense of humor that leaves you questioning - is he serious? Is he joking?? He has an unquenchable hankering for the finer things in life - good scotch, good coffee, good music, having a really good time. And yet he can roll up his sleeves and get elbows-deep in the muck of fixing just about anything - he's never met an appliance he couldn't tinker with and ultimately diagnose the problem to. He's quite the juxtaposition, my father.

And yes, he can be intimidating. His tough exterior consists of leather motorcycle boots and a resting "Don't mess with me" Yankee facial expression, yet he goofs off with the best of them, making up the silliest voices that leaves my toddler giggling in stitches. Growing up he would watch Doris Day musicals with us girls on Friday nights, he would put our underwear on his head to make us laugh, and he would play us songs on his guitar that made me fall in love with music.

These days he's getting a gorgeous salt-and-pepper look to him, his dark eyes still sparkly when he's got a story (or conspiracy) to tell of. He wells up with tears whenever he sees a horse in a field (something that is endlessly funny to me), because it brings back memories of his days working on his uncle's farm. He's curious, pouring hours into looking up every root word of the Bible, seeking answers to life's most confounding questions. He's a warrior, an out-of-the-box thinker, a troublemaker with a mouthful to say, a passionate teach and musician and a romantic with my mom.

Lacquered with layers of tough love and teddy bear love, he has been the most perfect dad to me and my two sisters. Not perfect in that he never made mistakes - he's always the first one to apologize, a quality I really respect about him - but he's perfect because he's tried his hardest to give us everything we could ever need or want. He didn't have involved parents while growing up, so his parenting skills have been learned along the way of raising us. Guided by only his instincts, and punctuated with lessons learned while on the job. I'm constantly amazed by him - his intense work ethic, his perceptive listening ear, his diligent commitment to discipline - these are all things that he had to learn the hard way while raising us girls. He didn't have parents to call on when he didn't know how to do something. He simply had to figure it out for himself.

As a parent myself these days, I'm humbled as I realize more and more how incredibly generous my dad has been with his life and his love. Even though I'm an adult, I still lean heavily on my parents for their wisdom and insights, especially as I raise my two little boys. I am so comforted by my dad's words of encouragement, his gentle corrections (okay, sometimes they're not so gentle, but they're usually necessary when I'm being a knucklehead), and his silly sense of humor that I am so endeared to. Sometimes I wonder how other people get along in life without laughing at themselves a little, a wonderful quality I so appreciate because I got it from him.

He's my dad, and I am so proud to be his daughter.

Thank you Dad, for being so wise and funny and generous and available to me whenever I need you. In an age when fatherhood is fading, I am keenly aware of your investment in my life and I wouldn't be the woman I am without you. You are the bravest, most wondrous soul, and I love you endlessly.

Sprints and Sprinklers!

I want to remember them just like this.

Young, brave, silly. Free.

I want to remember this stage of our life. Even though it's been a challenge, it's also been a dream come true, watching my boys grow together in love.

I want to remember this summer, every moment of it. This humidity, thick enough to swallow. The slick wet of the sprinkler, the infectious giggle of my baby, the flare of the sun through the backyard trees. Everett's flick of the frisbee, Daxton eying his brother with adoration. Stevie instructing them with everything he knows. I even want to remember the thickness of my body, the roundness of my thighs, ripe with nourishment for my baby boy. I was created to steward my family just like this. I am blessed.

I want to remember it being so hot, so so hot, that we all ran into the yard to cool off in the sprinkler 15 minutes before dinner. Even the mosquitoes needed a reprieve from this heat, and I won't be able to forget them, since our bodies are now riddled with their bites.

I want to remember Everett screaming "super heroes!!!", as he sprints back and forth through the sprinkler.

Every single moment of this life is a blessing. Every single moment, not just the picturesque ones when everyone is smiling in their perfectly pressed clothing. The messy ones, too. The sweaty ones, the stinky ones, the screaming ones. The moments when I'm overwhelmed because everyone is hungry for dinner, the moments when I'm followed into the bathroom by everyone because they all want to tell me things they need, the moments when I'm so tired that I want to slump into a nap at 4pm. These moments, though trying and taxing, are my great blessings. Because they are weaving together the fabric of this family that I am so privileged to shepherd. When I was a little girl, I never really dreamed of having a family. I always dreamed of having my name is lights on Broadway and wearing a red dress while I accepted an Oscar for best actress ;) Gotta love the dreams of a child! But now I know that this, this life I am living right now, is the greatest dream that could have ever come true for me. It's not easy, it's not perfect, but it is stunning. I revel in this blessing, to be a mom and a wife, and if I never accomplish another thing outside of this family life, I will still be a successful, accomplished, astonishingly blessed woman.

The heat is making me all swoony and that is just okay. May there be sprinklers and super heroes and melty popsicles in your future this weekend! Happy summer to us all!

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